and counting...

two more days and she will be off to Australia for one week holiday.
i hope i will get thru this period.
We had a trial period last week where we did not meet for a week but yet we still contact each other but this time round there would be no form of communication at all.

Btw on sat where we met, we headed down to East Coast Park for the gathering organized by Clement which honestly i think it was crappy. No one brought food except for Mr Clementi and it was crappy. He just brought Kai Lan and nothing else. It was totally weird for a picnic gathering at east coast park. The people present was hafiz, irfan, shaiful, hamimah, jeremy my cousin, my baby and me.

after east coast park, we headed down to fort canning park where we hang out and enjoyed the nature. After dat we had dinner at Al Jilani dan we hung out at SMU. We kinda spend the whole night morning there. It was actualli quite fun and i watched a very tragic love story which was well-recomended by my Darling and i have to say it was good.

haiz.....now i am just thinking of the upcoming week where she will only be back on National Day.
Aiyah i wanna watch fireworks with her......

btw to my guy friends, dudez just because i got a Gf doesnt mean i forget u all. Is been awhile dat i last hang out with u all so please dont ever say i dah lain ah.....

with so many problems surrounding us about relationships
i feel that i need to devote myself more to u
show u with more love and care
but how long do we have before u go overseas
and make me feel so lonely again for a long lonely one week
i noe this might be stupid or maybe common to some of my frds
that i am saying she is the one but i realli feel that she
SITI MARINAH the women now in my life
manjering, caring , loving me
is the women i am waiting for and shall keep her till as long as
god and our love permit.
baby baby how i wish we could grow up together and be sweetheart childhood lovers
so dat i will spend the whole lifetime with u by the countryside and enjoy the beauty of nature and simpleness of life


and guess wat i went for my friday prayer after a long time

wat more can i ask

33 pieces of paper
=
a heart that is shared with kai & mar

i am actually exhilarated to post this entry that i tried to type many things many words many feelings for this entry but i realli dunno how to phrase it in the end. All i could come out was SITI MARINAH i am so deeply in love with you cause i never felt so much love before in my life.

tell me where can u find a girl like her..........
on Sunday she needed to apologize to me so she decided to meet up and i too had to leave the house coz i need to get the company stamp for the warranty card for my monitor which went berserk and couldnt work. We meet at city hall and headed to The Aldephi.

Outside the shopping center she gave me a heart shaped box filled with 33 pieces of paper which contains 33 different ways of how i cared about her. Hmm i dunno y 33 but yah 33 it was. With this 33 pieces of paper, i can assemble them into a shape of a heart and the end product is wat u see at the top. Not forgetting a colourful beanie teddy bear that she gave to me. i tried uploading the pics but guess blogger.com is facing some probs thus i am unable to upload the pictures.

On Monday, i had to send the monitor for a 1 to 1 exchange and she accompanied me. She from her house pick me up from my camp dan after dat head down to my house and wait for me downstairs while i brought the monitor down and she had a close brush with my Mom. We took a cab to and fro to sim lim and my house. I am so delighted that she accompany me for that few hours and yet she is already happy. we ended the night by hanging out at the park near my house where we were on the swing and challenging each other who is able to swing higher. Of coz she won coz hehehe i suck at it hahahah.....

today i supposed to have my surgery to remove the mole on my lip but in the end we didnt coz we had to fork ot $5oo bucks to pay for the surgery. Dam it they considered the mole on my lip as a cosmetic surgery. Like wat the hell!!!!!
I had to wait there for an hour or so where no one attended to us and also i was not informed wat was happening. All i could do was sit there at the couch and read the July edition of Newsweek. I was FLUSTERED and DEBILITATED (hehehehhe thanks baby) at the service. When i started to enquire about my status and wat was happening than i was ushered to a consultation room where there was a public relations officer who was realli sucky at talking but managed to cool the bomb ticking situation cause she was realli extremely soft spoken. She was going to refer us to the social welfare assistance to help us pay the fee which i think is an insult to me.


ani way i have decided not to remove the mole ani more.
and also here is a song(lyrics onli) dedicated to
my love my sayang my baby my angel my princess

Lying here with you,
Listening to the rain,
Smiling just to see, The smile upon your face,
These are the moments, I thank God that I'm alive,
These are the moments, I'll remember all my life,
I found all I've waited for,
And I could not ask for more.
Looking in your eyes,
Seeing all I need,
Everything you are, Is everything to me,
These are the moments, I know heaven must exist,
These are the moments, I know all I need is this,
I have all I've waited for,
And I could not ask for more.

Chorus:
I could not ask for more than this time together,
I could not ask for more than this time with you,
Every prayer has been answered,
Every dream I have's come true,
Yeah right here in this moment, Is right where I'm meant to be,
Here with you, Here with me. . .

These are the moments, I thank God that I'm alive,
These are the moments, I'll remember all my life,
I've got all I've waited for,
And I could not ask for more. . .

Chorus:
I could not ask for more than this time together,
I could not ask for more than this time with you,
Every prayer has been answered,
Every dream I have's come true,
And right here in this moment, Is right where I'm meant to be,
Here with you, Here with me. . .

I could not ask for more than the love you give me,
Cause it's all I've waited for . . .
And I could not ask for more,
I could not ask for more.

i am satisfied with wat i have my dear and thats having u as my lovely gf.

wat a gig.....

today head down to substation for loudfest
line up was great on flyers but on the day itself one biggest disappointment
Recover didnt play for the gig coz shahran had to work
i was like so looking forward for a hell of a good time.
ani way went to the gig with my Boo
guess we had a great time together with her trying to pin me down.
she tried several times but to avail.

she had her pampers, she had everything she wanted.
i got to see idayu ahhaha which is surprising with her BF.
For me all i had was her and nothing else all i wanted to be with her
but on this night she said something dat broke my heart.

how could u say such thing......
it may not seems you dont mean it but infront of strangers
u just blabber words that make me wonder all these while
whether have i been taking care of you.

i am sad, i am heartbroken and i am disapponted.....

though the family has some hiccups here and there for me
i am still very happy coz i found a gf whom i realli love and feel love
spending times on each others lap sleeping,
feeding each other with cakes,
sharing stories from anything under the sun,
listening to each other complaints about work and life
pampering one another with the cute funny noises,
walking hand in hand with you
enjoying the simplest form of relatinship
i just realli like it.

now i ask myself wat is love
and all i can think about is U

X@#!$%^&!@#$%^&

i am so disappointed is the 2nd time my parents wrongly suspect me.

ytd i was realli tired and after eating i realli wanted to sleep but my mom told me to wait for my dad coz he wanted to talk to me about something. When he came back while eating he started by asking me how come i am back late ytd and is it a must to see my GF almost everyday( which in actual fact last week i onli like meet her twice onli on the weekdays). Than my dad told me that if i want a gf make sure the gf comes to the house and come not just when i am at home but even when i am not at home also must come.( i am like wat the hell)

Dan he ask me whether i was serious with my Gf. I told him i am not sure but is no harm trying to be serious with her than he kept quiet. He changed the topic. He talk about when he was young when he got no money wat he does and also like how he never get scolding from his mom which is my late Grandma whom i sayang most. Hmm than i was realli sleep but i controlled, dan all of a sudden my mom just step into the conversation and say than you still dont want to admit wat u have done. ( i was like WAT WAT WAT WAT). I replied i realli dunno wat u all are talking about but if ur talking about my Bro money stolen than is not me coz half of the money is taken by my youngest bro who was instructed by my mom to take money from him coz she didnt have the cash at dat point of time and also my bro came back late so my youngest bro just took the money from his pocket and with an intention to return it back when he received his pocket money from my mom. I was like i told them off, so now by saying this u all assume that i am the thief of this family ah.

My dad turned defensive while my mom just walked away to watch her TV. How could they just wrongly accuse the own son lor...frankly speaking yes i have been spending more money dan as usual and my income is lesser dan my bro and i never "contribute" much to the family in terms of cash, household chores and all the craps i use to do ah but come on ah i was like so for the family till the age of 21 now i am going to be 22 wanna have a start of my own life with my own love and here u are trying to accuse me.

haiz....everytime i tell them off nicely or argue back they sure to have something in mind to say. Yes i do agree with some of thier point but some points i beg to differ so y cant i voice out my own opinion. I just have to say dat my parents have never appreciated what the children done for the family.

I am so disappointed.

a day without news from her.....

today has been quite a torturing day for me.....
we have not been contacting each other since the last msg which was 1330hrs.
is not we never contact each other but i dont want her to contact me coz she is in overseas and it will cost her quite a sum if we contact thus i told her to not sms me.

haiz i am lingering with nothing to do.....
facing the computer and checking my msn to see whether she is online.
OMG is onli a day is onli 24 hrs and i am like this

how am i going to last for a week when she will be at down under with her family
A week of no MSN ,7 days of no news, 168 hours of no contact, 10080 minutes of missing her real bad.

tmr is work day but i dont feel like working.
Tmr i need to head back to camp as a Corporal but i am not sewing my rank yet.
Should i get a rest after a hectic week last week to rest and spend time with my dear?

i will be missing u

Markai never meet for two days markai gets so grumpy
Markai wishs that markai can never be seperated but thats impossible
Markai is going to Australia for a week and i dunno how lor.....
ani way i have given markai my orange Shirt for her to remember me when she is overseas.

how how how........

ytd markai met and lepak together at Suntec Fountain. hmmm i think we could lepak at somewhere more cosy but nvm. She was reading her story book while i was lying down on her. i just love to lie down on her n knowing that she will sayang me and also look out for me, the feeling is just so good and lovely.

from the fountain there, we head down to the sky garden heheehh dats where we were listening to her fav music and also currently my fav music and we started to kiss for the whole song. It make us feel as if we were some movie stars kissing on screen. hahhahha it was realli magnificient to be kissed in such a manner and ambience. It was a memorable event. The best was that she had caramel before we kissed and it like WOAHHHH enhancement....

dan later we head down to Baybeats. It was packed to the brim and i kinda hate the surroundings. We were literally counting the numbers of avenged sevenfold Tee and tell u wat is a tenfold of it.....The main reason y i was there was to see leaven trait and plain sunset. Hmmm i shall say the set was ok ah not dat power ah but wat to do....the stage is so far away. the crowd was realli looking for some cheap thrill and the security guys were realli rubbish. No moshing and no body surfing. actualli i kinda understand y they stop moshing and bodysurfing.

Moshing and Bodysurfing are actions that leads to happiness and smile but it seems like in Singapore ppl are moshing with anger and violence which is not the way to do it. I could see the face of anger and hate while ppl were moshing. But the extremely stupid and ridiculous thing happen to me. there was this kid who was in all black top and bottom and a red tie(typical MCR DUDE ) was moshing behind me. I dont consider it as moshing ah coz he was more like pushing me from the back.

He was like also shouting from the back FUCK U FUCK U all the way. I bet if he was the lead singer and his only vocubulary was fuck u, it would make quite a crappy good song cause he fit the words nicely into the melody. Ani way i am just proud that during baybeats markai feels confident and has no worries coz she feels she is well protected and look out. She was roaming around like nobody's business.

Ani way baybeats to me was cheap thrill for all these young kids were there just to fight and MOSH. I so just love our gigs. though the number is not as big as baybeats memories of NEXUS auditorium 2 years ago is still fresh in my mind. NOw i am looking forward for.....LOUDFEST hehehhe

and i miss u....

13/07/06

Here i am today at my office blogging for the first time. Is 8.10pm and i am in camp doing my COS Duty. Today was a sucky day for me actualli not just today ah but the whole week ah. I now understand the meaning of backstabbers reall pain in my ass.

i recently kena backstab by a few ppl. So much for helping them out and in return i kena fuck in the ass.I just wonder how ppl can live in such an environment for more than 2 years.

i shall not go into details about wat has happen sekali i kena charged ah for wrongly accusing ppl ah which i dont wish to extend my freakign stay in the Army.

btw luckily there was a few moments of excitement for me coz i managed give my dearest a surprise visit. i was kinda feeling awkard and also tensed ah coz is not appropriate to be in uniform in CBD area.

Any way today had to return stores at ayer rajah camp but there wasnt any vehicel so i had to use the despatch vehicle to send me. But before sending me to Ayer rajah camp they had to go to a few places Mindef, Sispec and PLC than they sent me to Ayer Rajah.

After returning my stores, i requested to head back home myself cause they were going to continue despatching so tada dats when i decided to give her a surprise pop in at her work place with a small cup of mashed potato.

Ani way i left the camp at like 10 and i got back of camp around 3. It felt so good how i wish today i dont have duty ah and my day would be so much faster......

Btw baybeats is nearby Ahmad going??????

how to not love her so much.......
though i kinda feel abit jealous about her manager but overall
tell me how not to love her so much when she remembers wat i have done for her.......this was extracted from her blog.......

have come to realize that i update this shit like monthly. hoho.
not that i bother anyway, if i have something to write about and if i feel like it then, voila!
work's been grrrrreat so far. and woohoo. they entered me in a barista competition which by the way, i was so against. anthony stole my ic, wrote down my name, took roy's handphone for my number and faxed the damn paper in before i could even scream his full name.
ANTHONY JASON watever.
ure lucky ure an expired product, anthony. not that u'll ever read this. one day i will put spin mix instead of vanilla in ure damn latte i make each morning. hehe. but anyways, i still love him.
oh oh!
let me relate to everyone now how sweeeeet my manager is. aside from the fact that he pays for my entries to clubs and stuffs, he buys me lunch, makes sure im not overworked (at times), helps me mop the floor when we do our closing together, coax me when i get slammed, calms me down when i get all gittery especially when a person comes in ordering 17 lattes. or when Clive comes for his medium cappucino. hohoho.
ok anyway, he plugged in his ipod shuffle and there was one song that i just loveedddddd. and me being the idiot who never ever listens to radio, have no idea what the title of the song was. on thursday i told him "eh roy sayang i like one song from ure ipod", to which he asked me "which?" and i just shrugged. on friday i had to stand by the espresso machine from 7am all the way til 5pm, due to roy's own bubbling incident *roar*, so i told them to play my cd and not change it til i left for home. Since roy was doing closing, i told him "eh dont change cd ok? cos tomorrow i'm working and i want to play this cd, thanks!" to which he just nodded.
the next morning i came, switched on the cd player, and asked another part timer if they changed the cd inside and she said "no lah ure damn cd was playing the whole day and night" so yay, i pressed play and found that someone switched the cd. and when the next song played, it was the song that i was looking for in Roy's ipod! he actually burned me a cd, put it in the player before leaving the shop, knowing that i'll be the one switching the cd player on Saturday to surprise me.
so sweet rite.
yes i have the sweetest manager arounddddddddddd. and i luv him to bits and pieces.





ANYHOWS,
aside from roy, someone else is being ultra sweet to me as well. waited for me for 3 hrs to do closing, didnt even complain and could even tell me "dont rush, relax, just do ure work, i'll wait". 3 hours ok. he just sat outside my shop and waited. he even bought me the new L'arc en Ciel dvd Asian Tour 2005! the one i went for in japan. and he smses me every day to make my whole afternoon so much more bearable, my friends love him to bits cos he's just so funny, my maid loves him to bits cos she thinks he's cute, even my managers think he's adorable. he brushes my hair in front of everyone in the train, jumps off stage to give me a peck during his gig, he carried me on his shoulder when i told him i miss feeling like a 5yearold, he sits with me at a bay to sing songs and laugh the night long, he lets me sleep on his lap for 2 hrs while he strokes my hair, he took an mc from work just to spend one hour with me to send me to work, he makes the effort to talk instead of shouting or scolding, he makes me laugh, he tickles me all over, he listens to songs with me and sings along, he piggybacks me when i'm tired even though his leg was aching, he wrestles with me when i feel playful, he trusts me with my friends, and he manja-s me like there's no tomorrow.
:)

and yes, he makes me so very happy.
especially when he said i looked stunning.
thank you!

ladies and gentleman
i got an announcement to make.........
i am a corporal already
i am have fallen in love twice with the same girl
i am not going to drink any more after the incident
y
coz i feel stupid for not being able to react to my surrounding, all i could do was just stoned.
i am enjoying my love of my life.
i miss my friends(when we going to lepak again)
i am handsome.
i am putting on weight.
and this is y i am so in love......

1st July

is been a long break from clubbing so today decided to club with my baby. Expecting a big turnout but it was quite disappointing but nevertheless we still went with who was present. My Baby brought her close friend name kai also and i was with Gaint the Ivan.

we drank, we danced and in the end i got drunk
i went to club was to look after my baby but in the end she had to look after me. I was like puking on the floor inside and also near the emergency exit. I also puked on Ivan shirt and i am so so sorry about it.

i guess i puked about 8 to 10 times and it feel bad it is as if the whole stomach wants to force its way put of my throat and that sucks.Maybe because i drank too much and too hard too. My Baby says i drink like water hahhha which yah i think i drink dat way.

in the end i was well taken care of by my baby and also her friend kai. She was extremely sweet taking care of me and my baby. My baby too was gone and as usual SOOO her Self hehhehehe. We were dan transported to bras basah where we hang out with a few of our crusty punk friends who held ipod in thier hands and some woah woah handphones. So much for the Crustism.

we hang out at bras basah till we manage to get our first train and i send the girls home. My baby and i accompanied Kai to Boon Lay dan after dat i send my baby to her home. Before going home she wanted to sleep somewhere but not her home so we decided to sleep at chinese garden. She slept onli for about 2 hours and she was complimenting y i didnt move an inch to wake her up.

so after her sleep i send her back home and she was reluctant to let me in to her house because of the maid but dunno what strucked her mind she asked me in and introduced me to her maid. Her maid was pretty but not attractive to me cause my baby was super STUNNING. my Baby feed me alot of food at her house dan at around noon we made a move cause she was going to hang out with her friends.

On my way to the Mrt Station my dad called me to head down to eunos for a funeral. My auntie's mom which is my grandma but in law passed away . So imagine me from clubbing went to my Baby's house dan down to eunos i was like super extremely stinky and smelly. I was also dreading the smell of liqour from my breathe cause i will be meeting MUSLIMS uncles and aunties. If they smell, it would be nice to my status hahahahha

Luckily my breathe was ok with the help of clorets and also the food dat i ate at my baby's house.I spent the whole afternoon there and it was like really time wasting. i was really in a bad state cause my pants were like extremely dirty and my shirt stinks and my shoes and socks stick too cause i was puking and the puke got to my shoe.

overall i really enjoy my time though is was kinda sad cause many of them turn me down last minute but is still ok cause i got my BABY