...................................

today went back to work met lots of FUCKKED up Customers.......
from fussy to choosy to act as if they are rich and smart customers u name it i got it....
but dats not the whole point.

the whole point is i have been seeing couples everywhere, everyone is so happy being a couple be it Lesbians, Gays, normal couples. everyone is so happy but how bout it, what happen to my relationship? what happen is it my fault that i destroyed my happines is it my fault that i broke up with her is this my fault for knowing her is it my fault to let this befall me, i really dunno i am lost i am sad i am lonely i am crying in my heart again but what can i do what should i fo go back to her forget about her which i cant find another girl which i dont one i really dont know.
furthermore the date is coming closer is like 5 more days to my 3rd month anniversay of knowing her the day where i fall deeply into her......the day where i find her the only most memorable gem i have ever found, the only beautiful flower amoung the garden but what am i to her just another bee taking nectar from her......
argh.......shit it
i am emotionally unstable, weak, deprive of attention, deprive of crankiness........i want to be cranky crappy so i can forget about my past but i dont have much opportunity, argh............
this is the purest of pain
i cant even hide i cant even smile cant even be happy from the bottom of my heart...............haiz
kai kai kai kai kai kai kai kai kai kai kai kai kai kai kai kai